Traumatic grief can also occur after a series of sudden losses. This happened to me, which prompted me to write this book. In 2005, following a year of agonizing infertility treatments, I lost multiple pregnancies and was told I would never be able to have children. I tried to reason my way through the grief and hide my pain from friends, but deep down I ached with sorrow, anger, and confusion. My husband patiently supported me as best he could, but a few months later, his mother died, leaving him grief stricken.
Transforming Traumatic Grief: Six Steps to Move from Grief to Peace After the Sudden or Violent 13
In Chapter 2, Overview of EMERGE and the Science Behind It, I present an overview of an approach for transforming traumatic grief that I call EMERGE. I use the acronym, EMERGE, for six steps you can use to move from grief to peace. These steps are: 1) Engaging mindfulness, 2) Making living stories, 3) Envisioning connection, 4) Reprocessing traumatic memories, 5) Generating new meanings, and 6) Establishing community. You will also learn about research that supports the effectiveness of each of these steps.
I know exactly what you are going through and I am going through the same thing after the loss about one month ago of our 6 year old boston who was our bestest boy baby and like our child, he did not wrong. he got a neck spine issue out of nowhere, which our first boston got as well at a older age but came out of it with treatment, however our buster could not kick it and it came suddenly from chasing squirrels in the yard and he came in with a stiff neck and in pain. misdiagnosed by our vet and it took 3 vets even me telling them what was wrong before he was finally treated for the right problem and then over a couple of weeks started to recover then last pill took a bad turn to worse and just a few days we had to euthanize him as he was paralyzed could not move eat drink potty or anything overnight. had to watch him 2 hours before vet opened in the morning to take him, it was such a sudden thing that it has me in a tail spin. my first boy lived 18 years old was a boston and 3 weeks later we got this baby boy. i miss the life in the house but dont want to replace as there will never be a replacement for him but i miss the life he brought and joy. i cry daily seeing his little face trusting me when they had to put the port in his foot for the injection and i cant get that out of my head. it is horrible. it was like losing any loved one in death. i know we did the right thing but feel we were robbed and it was so sudden. i look at puppies bostons again and just love them but i feel so painful to try and replace my boy. i am so messed up and just feel i wont get over this and stop seeing his face wondering what was going on. know you are not alone with your pain.
We have learned that teens respond to people who choose to be a companion to them on the grief journey, rather than to direct it. Grief for a teen is different from that of a child or an adult, compounding and complicating his or her already complex life. When someone close to a teen dies, they may suddenly find themselves dealing with possible unresolved issues with the person who died, the circumstances of the death, dramatic changes in his or her life situation or changes in relationships with others after the death.
Healing Your Traumatized Heart: 100 Practical Ideas After Someone You Love Dies a Sudden, Violent DeathBy Alan Wolfelt, Ph. D.This book contains 100 practical ideas for families and friends who are affected by a sudden, violent or traumatic death. Some of the tips include understanding the special characteristics of trauma grief and how to cope with that grief.
An article by the NEJM (The New England Journal of Medicine) states complicated grief cases are multifactorial, and that complicated grief is distinguished from major depression and post-traumatic stress disorder. Evidence shows that complicated grief is a more severe and prolonged version of acute grief than a completely different type of grief. While only affecting 2 to 3% of people in the world, complicated grief is usually contracted when a loved one dies suddenly and in a violent way.[41]
Everyone's grief experience will be different from the next person's. Since there's no timeline for grief, it's possible to experience the effects of your loss for several years afterward. The way you move through your sorrow will be your unique experience, but you can expect some shared responses with others who've experienced a similar loss.
Either of these extremes typically lasts for a few days after the death of a loved one. Most people suffering from ordinary grief will go back to their regular routines within a few weeks following the traumatic event. 2ff7e9595c
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